the idea of protecting would imply that there is some possession-
a toast implies change.
noone toasts normals days
or gutter heads.
i swear to god i have come to love some of you so dearly.
i count on you to get me by.
but i have begun to wonder about my contribution to life
i want to go to school.
i want to move far away.
im scared.
but only of god and a witness stand.
im not sure how much longer i want to do this if it doesnt mean anything-
i need a push a sign something that puts me back on course.
if i go for it you tell me i shouldnt have.
if i lay and wait you think i dont care.
i want to believe so badly.
morning is just a cold shower for dreams.
broke the little bone on top of my foot.
oh well i am so accident prone, i owed the universe some marrow.
not gonna back out on you.
3rd time in an mri this year.
there is no room colder or smaller.
there is something about the repetitive clicking that gives me visions.
i really feel for people who truly have to go through this on a daily basis or need crutches everyday of their life. honestly it is humbling for me.
and i probably needed that humility.
thanks for your understanding.
the painkillers and pride have my head in a bit of a tangle.
help me unwind it.
is there a song you count on every time?
i swear by the baxters
and the dropouts who only kept the books and the freshman fifteen
awake inside someone elses dream
alone in someone elses throne
gift wrapped wasp nest
blue ribbon jealousy contest
cant make everyone in the world unhappy all of the time
theres no glory on the road
its just a quick way to make you old
theres a new order
my disorders
i am just a sweettooth in the cavity search of life
